Thoughts

[alexisjane]

I'm upset, and conflicted.



I've been spending the last couple of hours trying not to cry. This whole Dreamweaver thing has just been so wearing. Not so much because of finally getting confirmation on what it seems many of us had suspected and dismissed in the past, but because of the way it seems to be bringing everybody together in a great outpouring of love and support.

I just wish we could have had that a few months ago when DW started a hate post against someone who dared question the authenticity of his life. Then, a fair few number of people felt justified in jumping on his bandwagon and vilifying someone, without knowing all the facts or the intentions of that person. The anguish caused by that...it was bad, really really bad.

So while I'm happy that everyone is going to be a little more loving and hopefully a little more cautious in the future, I hope everyone is going to take a breath next time one of us histrionically announces they're being bullied or whatever. Communication on the internet is fraught with misunderstanding at the best of times, and people's intentions are never clear cut even away from the screen.

I was ready to delete my journal this morning, I'm so upset about this. The worst thing is that the person involved has such a huge capacity for love and forgiveness than in all this, they never once had a bad word to say about anyone. Including DW. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if they ask me to delete this : )

Having said that, I'm so happy and proud to know everyone on my f-list. I think people will always try to fool us, and they will probably succeed. But I would much rather have that than never know any of you : )

I do truly love your faces ♥ xxx

Comments

[septembers-coda.livejournal.com]

Aw, bb. Please never delete. We love and need you.

This whole thing... I haven't commented anywhere, because I have no idea what to say. I didn't even know which of my friends were affected. BL knew what this was right away, almost as soon as DW showed up anywhere, and she clued me in... I was suspicious but never felt my suspicion would help anyone, if that makes sense. BL knew and believed someone who did a really similar Munchausen-by-Internet thing YEARS ago, so she recognized it. I didn't follow the whole thing, so the later details and the first time he (or she for all we know) was confronted, I missed. But now I think, even if I had tried to warn people, what good would it have done? Over time we all become a little more cynical, and that's too bad. But as you said, why hate someone, either for telling us truths/suspicions we don't want to hear, or for being mentally ill in a way we could ignore? I just never responded to any of his posts about the terrible things supposedly happening in his life, and figured what was going to happen was going to happen, as long as he wasn't asking people for money or anything (which he never did, right? I hope not).

Anyway, this was on my mind, so I was glad to see your post, but very sorry you've been so upset. Sending you love and support. Just be you and be here with us and spread the love you feel-- that's all any of us can do to combat the occasional craziness of this world. <3 <3

[alexisjane.livejournal.com]

I think that was the frustrating thing, that he always had an explanation that could have true...and quite frankly, when something is that bizarre you cant believe that anyone would make it up.

I think we were all taken in, and even if we had doubts, it somehow feels worse now that we didn't stand up and say something...idk, it's an impossible situation.

I don't think I would delete really, I was just overwhelmed this morning, but yes, love is the only antidote to this kind of fuckery, so more of that : ) Give some of mine to BL in the form of a hug, would you? Miss you guys ♥♥♥ xxx